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THE DAILY ATHOLIAN:

T.I.S.H. WORLD NEWS

Tag: Satire

Sonny Cecil by ethsNov 23, 201518:2111/23/2015

SONNY CECIL ORDER

MEET SONNY CECIL, OWNER OF ATHOL SENIOR FUN AND FROLIC CENTER!

Muffin Man by ethsNov 23, 201513:1611/23/2015

MS. NODOFF MUFFIN MAN — MS. NODOFF, FOUNDER OF SLEEPWALKING SCHOOL.

KLEIN HIME, INVENTOR OF DEHYDRATION FORMULA, SIGHTS MUFFIN MAN IN MAUI!

Ima Athol by ethsNov 22, 201515:0011/22/2015

BOX THAT CONTAINS IMA ATHOL'S BRAIN — BOX THAT CONTAINS IMA ATHOL'S BRAIN

VISIT UNIQUE TO ATHOL EXHIBIT! SEE BOX THAT CONTAINS IMA ATHOL’S BRAIN!

Ulric Utter by ethsNov 21, 201517:1411/21/2015

ULRIC UTTER CARROT

WATT BLASTS UTTER! PLEASANT ENGLISH IS ANTI GREEN, RUINS PLANET!

Dr. Long by ethsNov 20, 201513:1311/20/2015

DR. LONG'S COOKIES — DR. LONG, EMOTIONS-RELATED-TO-COOKIES SPECIALIST

CONCLUSIVE RESULTS IN STUDY WHERE PARTICIPANTS WERE SUBJECTED TO VIOLENT WORDS IN COOKBOOKS!

Will Watt by ethsNov 19, 201516:4111/19/2015

WILL WATT CUT THIS PINEAPPLE — AT AGE 3, WILL WATT WON THE SLICE-A-PINEAPPLE-IN 2 1/2-MINUTES AWARD

WILL WATT’S CAMPAIGN PROMISE: SHORTEN SPEECH, SAVE ENERGY, REDUCE HOTHOUSE EFFECT!

Dr. Long by ethsNov 19, 201510:5411/19/2015

DR. LONG APPLIANCE SPECIALIST

BUY A TOASTER THAT LISTENS TO YOUR COMPLAINTS FROM LA ROLE MODEL APPLIANCES!

Artist Ah by ethsNov 18, 201516:5111/18/2015

BURNER PLATE — ARTIST AH'S "DISTRESSED," A METAL SCULTURE

ARTIST AH’S CAMPAIGN VISION: TO BE GREEN, ATHOL WILL PAINT ALL BUILDINGS YELLOW AND BLUE!

Dr. Long by ethsNov 17, 201519:29

DR. LONG PENGUIN — DR. LONG, PENGUIN THERAPIST

MYSTERIOUS PENGUIN PARACHUTES ON TO ROOF OF B AND B AND B IN ATHOL!

Mrs. Smith by ethsNov 16, 201520:37

MRS. SMITH'S MEMOIR

MEET MRS. SMITH, ATHOL RESIDENT!

Husband of CEO by ethsNov 16, 201512:11

HUSBAND OF CEO LIFE EMPTY

SCHOOL OF HOLEOLOGY OFFERS NEW COURSE: SWISS CHEESE: THEORY OF HOLES IN

GRAMPS #3924 by ethsNov 13, 201519:2811/13/2015

GRAMPS #3924 BRITCHES

IF ELECTED MAYOR, MR. WHOOEY WILL INSTALL PARKING METERS AND TOLL BOOTH!

Keith M. Caged by ethsNov 13, 201513:51

KEITH M. CAGED EGGS AND BACON — KEITH M. CAGED'S MOTHER MADE HIM SMILEY EGGS AND BACON ON SATURDAYS UNTIL HE LEFT FOR COLLEGE.

GOTCHA TO REPLACE CATCHEM AS T.I.SH. EAST BORDER GUARD!

Henrietta Huphup by ethsNov 12, 201511:3311/12/2015

HUPHUP BUBBLE SHOES

HUPHUP, PROMISE-TO-KEEP-MY-PROMISE CANDIDATE, PROMISES TO KEEP HER PROMISES!

Uncategorized by ethsNov 12, 201511:2711/12/2015

RADISHES BUBBLE

LA ANIMAL AND SALAD CAFE PROVIDES KNIFE, FORK, AND PLATE WITH MEALS!

Mr. Whooey by ethsNov 11, 201519:07

MR. WHOOEY FAVORS — MR. WHOOEY, GROP (GREED-IS-GOOD PARTY) PLATFORM

CAMPAIGN UPDATE ON CANDIDATES’ WRONGDOINGS!

Shimy Hime by ethsNov 11, 201515:0911/12/2015

SHIMY AT CONVENTION — SHIMY HIME AT WWHBSBTMITL (Women Who Have Been Shrunk by The Men in Their Lives) CONVENTION. SHIMY IS ON THE RIGHT.

KLEIN HIME DISAPPEARS ON CRUISE SHIP WITH ANTIDOTE TO UNSHRINK HIS WIFE!

Me-Jane by ethsNov 10, 201519:2811/10/2015

HANDS WITH WRINKLES — BEFORE CHOCOLATE SYRUP TEST

NEW STUDY SHOWS THAT CHOCOLATE SYRUP DESTROYS WRINKLES!

Mrs. Long by ethsNov 9, 201519:0111/10/2015

MRS. LONG'S RUBBER DUCKY

MRS. LONG, 99 YR. OLD WOMAN DISCOVERED IN ATHOL UNDERGROUND MAZE, KEEPS A RUBBER DUCKY IN HER PURSE!

YON WONDER by ethsNov 8, 201517:2911/10/2015

DONUT HOLES — THESES WERE INTENDED TO BE DONUT SQUARES.

ATHOL NOVEMBER DEALS: 30% OFF ON SLIGHTLY MISSHAPED DONUT SQUARES!

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