Late yesterday afternoon, Janice J. Heimer-Schmidt found the grate covering the Shimola Ann Bancanfanmannanpanrantanvan Black Hole. Keith M. Caged, East Border Patrol Guard admitted that he had not noticed it missing at the time Muffin Man may have disappeared into the Black Hole.
LOIS LOIS’S MOTHER BECOMES DESPONDENT OVER DAUGHTER’S DISAPPEARANCE!
Mrs. Lois of Lafayette, CA, told Will Catchem, newly assigned guard to East Border Patrol, “Lois Lois and I have always gotten along well. We just haven’t spoken in seven years.” While Atholians thought Lois Lois had gone back to her native town of Lafayette, CA, Mrs. Lois thought her daughter still lived in Athol.
This lends to the evidence that Lois Lois entered the Black Hole seven years ago and Muffin Man, DOP mayoral candidate, missing since August 25, 2015, was delivering a care package to her.
INTERVIEW WITH MAE PULLHAM, ATHOL DENTIST AND GOOD FRIEND OF MUFFIN MAN.
Pullham commented, “Muffin Man and I went out quite a bit, usually to La Animal and Salad Cafe, but we were never intimate. We both devoted our extra time to work. And I wish him all the best wherever he is.” When asked if she knew why Muffin Man’s intention as mayor was to situate businesses alphabetically, she made no comment. There’s been speculation that Muffin Man had ulterior motives. If arranged in alphabetical order, Pullham’s business name, La Dentist, would be placed next to La Donut Hole.