In an interview today, Ulric Utter, running on the SLOP platform, begged candidates to eliminate V (violent) words and S (scary) words from their speeches. “Above all”, he stated, “Speak with kindness to one another.” In […]
Me-Jane is running on COP (Chocolate-Only-Party) ticket. “Chocolate should be available day and night.” Muffin Man is running on DOP (Depends-Upon Party) ticket. “Athol businesses should be alphabetically situated.” Ms. Lessparts is running on FOP […]
Earlier today at a campaign rally for Yon Wonder, Muffin Man attacked Wonder with three-day old salad greens. Wonder recently changed careers from Fitness Trainer to Colorful Food Artist. Wonder is running on the Loathe-Stickers-On […]
Vicious pranks on two mayoral candidates occurred late last night. A person or persons unknown broke into the homes of Yon Wonder, LOP candidate for mayor, and Me-Jane, COP candidate for mayor, applying alien monster stickers […]
Today, Yon Wonder chose the symbol for LOP party. Wonder just changed his career of Athol fitness trainer to Colorful Food Artist.
YON WONDER, ATHOL’S FITNESS TRAINER, CHANGES CAREERS! HE’S DOING WHAT HE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO: CREATE COLORFUL FOOD ART.
Yon Wonder, Athol’s fitness trainer, is running for Mayor of Athol on the newly formed Loathe-Sticky-Labels-On-Fruit Party (LOP) ticket. Wonder complains that stickers on produce are impossible to remove gently because he has big hands and […]