LEAD REPORTER INTERVIEWED ELSIE WHAT-WHEN AND YELLOW OBJECT INVESTIGATOR:

ELSIE WHAT-WHEN:

FOR NEW READERS, ELSIE WHAT-WHEN LOST HER PET SNAIL SUMMER IN A BRUTAL SAUTÉING ATTACK!

YELLOW OBJECT INVESTIGATOR:

LEAD REPORTER INTERVIEWED THE PILOT WHO FLEW WITH THE EVIDENCE TO A LAB:

ME-JANE, FALMART HOMES MIDWIFE AND RECENTLY RECOVERED FROM A FIERCE ANTI-CHOCOLATE ATTACK, ADMITTED SHE HAD BEEN EATING CHOCOLATE WHEN SHE WALKED TO THE GUARD HOUSE TO PLAY MONOPOLY:

SIDETRACKS:

DON JOHN AND HENRIETTA HUPHUP, DANCE INSTRUCTORS AND VEGETABLE WOUND SPECIALISTS, SPOKE ABOUT KEITH M. CAGED’s SURGERY:

FUTURE BACKSTORY: