ULRIC UTTER, FOUNDER OF THE ANTI-V (VIOLENT) AND ANTI-S (SCARY) WORDS INSTITUTE, RECENTLY ANNOUNCED THE SCHOOL’S NEW CLASSES ON SMILING!

TESTIMONIALS:

AN ATHOLIAN WHO EARLIER THIS YEAR WAS HIT ON THE HEAD BY A SPACE ALIEN BLENDER REPORTED:

AN ATHOLIAN SPECIALIST IN SPACE ALIEN RECYCLING PATTERNS,  WHO WAS HIT ON THE HEAD BY A FOOD PROCESSOR, SAID:

CAUTION:  A SMILE CAN BE DECEPTIVE.  READERS MAY RECALL THE PASTA ATTACK EARLIER THIS YEAR:

BREAKING NEWS:  NOD PMURT, CLOSELY ALIGNED TO A COUSIN RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT IN THE U.S.A.,  HAS DISAPPEARED.  

ASIDE 1: 

ULRIC UTTER REPORTED THAT HE HAD TO GIVE NOD PMURT A FAILING GRADE IN THE COURSE, “LEARN HOW TO SAY SOMETHING NICE AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK.”

ASIDE 2:

NOD PMURT’S MOTHER, ALSO MOTHER OF A BOY WHO CATCHES MOSQUITOES WITH HIS TONGUE, SAID:

ASIDE: 3