MINUTES of Athol Town Council meeting held on August 2, 2015, at Athol Public Library.
Grammy #211 took minutes. Members present:
Meeting began at 3:17 p.m.
MS. LESSPARTS lead the meeting for Melody Agogo who had to speak at a wheelbarrow conference.
ALL ATTENDING recited the T.I.S.H. pledge.
WILL WATT: Too many words in pledge. Spork, short speak.
SONNY CECIL: Spork, Nork!
MS. LESSPARTS: We need to move on. This is an emergency meeting.
WILL WATT: Emergency meeting.
SONNY CECIL: First we have to decide on codenames, as was approved in our last meeting.
GRAMPS #3924: When are we going to serve refreshments?
MS. LESSPARTS: Because of the short notice, we’ll have to forgo refreshments.
GRAMPS #3924: I was looking forward to bran muffins.
MRS. SMITH: I suggest we decide on a theme for codenames, something than relates to “Green” or “Terrorism.” Ice Cream rhymes with Green, doesn’t it?
MS. LESSPARTS: Excellent idea!
GRAMMY #211: Why do we need codenames?
SONNY CECIL: There are terrorists everywhere.
GRAMMY #211: What about recording the minutes?
SONNY CECIL: Don’t record our real names, only use our codenames.
GRAMMY #211: Then no one else in Athol will know who said what.
SONNY CECIL: Security is more important.
MS. LESSPARTS: We need to decide on an Election Day date and whether a U.S.A. citizen can run for mayor here in Athol.
MRS. SMITH: Why don’t we write our codenames down for Grammy #211?
ALL ATTENDING wrote down their codenames.
SCOOP OF DOOBIE: When should Election Day be held?
NILLA: Secret handshake, too? HaHa!
HOT ROCKY FUDGE: Not a bad idea.
SCOOP OF DOOBIE: Focus on Election Day!
SALTED CHOCOLATE CARAMEL: It might depend on how many candidates there are.
FRUTTI TUTTI: This is exciting!
LUSCIOUS LICORICE: Did you hear about the ailing poet who started writing before breakfast? He went from bed to verse.
LUSCIOUS LICORICE; Wasn’t Frutti Tutti’s handyman supposed to bring the espresso machine?
SCOOP OF DOOBIE: We also need to look at the legality of a U.S.A. citizen running for office of mayor.
HOT ROCKY FUDGE: No one can be mayor unless they’re a TISH citizen. Terrorists abound.
NILLA: Say, “Must be citizen.”
HOT ROCKY FUDGE: Stop the Sporking, already!
SALTED CHOCOLATE CARAMEL: I spoke with Keith M. Caged at East Border Patrol. He is going to publish the rules for becoming a citizen.
LUSCIOUS LICORICE: Did you hear about the underwear salesman who’d been debriefed?
SCOOP OF DOOBIE: We haven’t decided on anything today.
HOT ROCKY FUGDE: I move that Will Watt stop Sporking during meetings.
WILL WATT: Move table discussion.
SCOOP OF DOOBIE: We’ve run out of time.
HOT ROCKY FUDGE: I move we table this discussion until next meeting.
NILLA: Table discussion.
HOT ROCKY FUDGE: I move we choose a secret handshake next meeting.
NILLA: Handshake next meeting.
SALTED CHOCOLATE CARAMEL: I move we meet in two weeks and see how many people announce their candidacy.
SCOOP OF DOOBIE: I move that everyone read the rules of citizenship before the next meeting.
LUSCIOUS LICORICE: Did you know that people tend to tell worse puns as they get older? That’s why we call them groan-ups.